Friday, June 3, 2011

Fire Pit in Philadelphia

Before we even fixed up the  patio out front, my first thought was FIRE PIT!

Of course, no one wants an outdoor fire pit in the heat wave we just experienced, but the weather seems to have abated.  So when I stumbled upon this post at The Hardware Aisle, I was smitten.

Landmann makes a lot of great outdoor fire and grill equipment.  But the Ball O' Fire really sets my heart aflutter.  Originally $340.18, its currently on sale at for $192.04 with free shipping.

Seriously, a BALL OF FIRE.  Seriously.
Nice Opening Mechanism
User painted with Rustoleum Copper Finish

Goodness Gracious.  That's epic.  So very epic.
And for those of you curious, or for my neighbors who are all "Oh, Hell NO, he can't have a firepit on our oak tree lined block of 75 year old wooden row homes.", I submit the following quote from the Philadelphia fire code. 

F-307.4.3 Portable outdoor fireplaces. Portable outdoor fireplaces shall be used in accordance with the manufacturer’s instructions and shall not be operated within 15 feet (3048 mm) of a structure or combustible material. Outdoor fireplaces shall be constructed of a noncombustible material that is completely enclosed by solid or mesh material. The maximum openings of the mesh material shall not exceed 1 inch (25. 4 mm) measured diagonally.  

[Exception: Portable outdoor fireplaces used at one- and two-family dwellings.]

I don't even have to keep it 15 feet or 3048 mm from my house!  I can put it 3047 mm from the house.  I can jamb that great Ball O' Fire right up to the property line and party wall between my house and yours.  Don't push me!  I'll risk burning down both of our houses and even the rest of the block just to prove I CAN.  I grew up on a farm, B*****s!  We start forest fires for fun (and agricultural, landscaping, and environmental purposes).  But that's not the point, it's still fun!  You ever strapped a tank of kerosene on your back and stood in the middle of a brush fire, spraying fuel like you're peeing grain alcohol, just to show that flame who's boss?!?  Huh?  Have you?  I didn't think so.*

*Dear wife... as you read this, please keep in mind that I'm just talking smack.  I won't put it on the property line.  I'll keep it as far from the house as the patio allows.  I'll keep a fire extinguisher on hand at all times.  Heck, I'll even wear a flame retardant suit during the colder months if I'm allowed to have this.  Please?!?!?